Separation Anxiety
12 years ago
Scott and I have moved to the Beautiful state of Colorado in the southern suburbs of Denver. We miss our family and friends we left behind in Arizona and decided to create this blog to keep everyone updated on our life and explorations in Colorado.
Once we arrived at the end of the lower Columbine trail the mid Columbine was closed due to erosion so we choose to walk about 1 mile down a busy narrow road to get to the Mt. Cutler trail.
Hiking up Mt. Cutler I was out of breath and super hot! As we went up the mountain the temperature dropped and the view from the top was well worth the work.
Actually there were beautiful views along the entire hike. Views of the canyon, city and even a far away view of Seven Falls. I took over 100 beautiful pictures of various views throughout our hike I wish I could share all of them. Dogs are allowed on these trails and I want to bring Millie. Poor Sparky would not be able to hike these steep trails with her poor knee:(
The lady we spoke to at the Starsmore Discovery Center says the hike is breathtaking in the Fall, wouldn't you love to come and do this hike with us this fall? The best thing about this day: FREE!! All we had to pay for was Gas which was less than 1/4 of a tank in my Toyota Rav4 round-trip! Can't wait for our next adventure.
When we found ourselves good and hungry we stopped and ate lunch at The Mate Factor Common Grounds Cafe. I tried drinking a raspberry mate and Scott and I shared a tuna melt and a turkey wrap that were amazingly tasty. I had never heard of Yerba Mate a tea that apparently contains more antioxidants and vitamins than Green Tea. I felt good and energized after my drink could it be the tea or just psychological?
Garden of the Gods, Colorado Springs, CO
16th Street Mall in Downtown Denver
The crowds were worse and more drunk. I could not believe the lines for beer! Not that it mattered to us because neither of us wanted one. We only had $10 in tickets and the lines were so crazy we only bought a coffee and samples of cupcakes. We walked around the open areas away from the food and enjoyed the beautiful weather, scenery and music. I wish we could have sampled all the great food we smelled. Note to self.......next time try to come earlier in the day and bring cash!
Lately, the smallest reminders of my children as children brings tears to my eyes and causes my chest to hurt and my throat to feel as though there is a lump in it. There is no escaping these small reminders. Anyone who knows me understands my obsession with organization and lately I have been trying to eliminate unnecessary stuff I have been holding on to. Maybe this is not a good time but I am unemployed and want to make the most of this time by getting rid of clutter and making money by selling on Craigslist or Ebay. Today I pulled out a box of old CD's and was sorting through them when I came across the soundtrack for the Disney movie Tarzan. I instantly began to cry as memories of my kids and I singing and dancing to the CD came to mind. When I am out shopping and see a mother disciplining her child I try to tell myself see Jen all that chaos is over and now you have the freedom to shop without the pressure of "mommy I want this" or the stress of "I need to use the bathroom, I am hungry, When are we going home?" However, none of that works for me as I still get emotional, teary eyed and confused at where the time has gone. I feel like there is so much I wanted to do and experience with my kids and never got to. Sometimes I get upset with myself because I am upset. Eighteen years ago I was turning twenty-two and giving birth to my third and last child with excitement at the fact that I would be forty years old and my baby would be eighteen. Over the past eighteen years as I met women who traveled and experienced life before children I would think that's okay because I will be forty and all of my kids grown and I can travel and experience life at that point. Now here I am turning forty and my baby turning eighteen and all I can do is feel empty and sad. My kids practically grew up with me, they are my life and although I am proud of their achievements I want them back as my adorable, cute pain in the butt little kids.